On my 2026 ONE LITTLE WORD

Every January/February, I choose a word to guide my year. It’s not about making resolutions or setting lofty goals. For me, it’s about creating a gentle framework for reflection, a way to move through the year with more clarity and intention. Some words have felt like hopes I was reaching toward. Others have simply named the season I was already living. This time, the word arrived quietly but kind of undeniably: alchemy.

Alchemy speaks to transformation — the deep kind, the kind that happens slowly after everything has shifted. It’s not about glossing over pain or presenting a polished version of growth. It’s about working with what’s real. Alchemy allows the difficult, complicated pieces of our lives to become part of something meaningful. Not erased or hidden, but used in an intentional way.

After divorce or betrayal, many people describe a feeling of losing themselves. They talk about being unrecognizable in their own lives, and eventually finding their way back. That’s a valid and familiar story, but that really doesn’t resonate with me.

I didn’t disappear. Even in the most disorienting moments, I remained rooted in who I was, thanks to the amazing network of loved ones I had surrounding me. For a while, I questioned everything — and I won’t pretend that clarity came quickly. But over time, I realized the shift wasn’t in my identity. It was in my willingness to continue carrying things that no longer served me. I had to let go of roles, patterns, and friendships that didn’t align with who I was anymore. I made space. I released what was finished. And underneath all of it, I was still there — steady, grounded, and clearer than before.

One of the biggest shifts lately has been learning to trust my intuition again. That connection was shaky for a long time, especially in the wake of betrayal trauma. But slowly, I’ve rebuilt it — through stillness, through self-trust, through tools like tarot that help me pause and listen more closely. I’ve started noticing the quiet signals that were always there, the ones I used to doubt or override. Now, I suppose I’m just choosing to follow them.

That’s why alchemy feels right for this year. I’m not returning to a blank slate. I’m building something new from everything I’ve already lived. The strength, the scars, the lessons are all part of it.

This is the energy I’m carrying into 2026 — intentional, creative, and grounded. If you’ve chosen a word for your year, I’d love to hear what it is. And if you’re in a season of quiet transformation, know that you’re not alone. There’s a kind of magic in this slow, intentional becoming. That’s alchemy too.

And in the least shocking news of the blog post, Alchemy is also one of my favorite Taylor Swift songs from TTPD.

On my 2025 word – EASE

Hello blog world – I’m back! After hemming and hawing over what to do with this blog, I just couldn’t bring myself to cancel it. Many times this year, I have felt the tug to blog and return to this space. As many of you know, I am a verbal processor (aka open book, aka trauma dumper, aka be careful when you ask how I am) and love using the written word to make sense of the world around me. In the end (literally this month), my gut told me to keep it, pay to renew it and here we are. Because if I have learned one thing the past two years, is that my intuition/gut is a powerful witchy force and I need to listen to it.

So much has happened in the past two years and I know I have left you with sparse pieces of that puzzle but I am okay with that. The biggest puzzle that has been built meticulously is the act of healing and acceptance. I feel like I’m finally around the corner of that healing (I know I’ve sad that at previous chapters but now feel like it’s here to stay) and I’m also ready to keep sharing that journey with the world – in case someone else is going through it and selfishly, just to keep myself accountable and writing as a creative outlet.

Cats are a constant reminder of the importance of ease and rest.

Although I haven’t been publicly blogging, I have kept up my journaling practice and referenced back to January when I choose my One Little Word for the year. After an extremely hard 2024 where my heart, mind, and body were constantly exerting effort just to keep going, it was time to counterbalance that effort with EASE. I wanted to pursue ease, make sure I was intentionally scheduling rest, and keeping a promise to myself to listen to my body and give it what was easy to give at the time (this was often slowing down, rest, and stillness).

“Ease is not the absence of challenge, but the
presence of grace in the face of it.”

One of the aspects of healing I worked on this year was re-aligning with my intuition. After the betrayal trauma, I had some big realizations about ways I ignored my intuition in the past and some inherent anger I actually had toward it for “letting me down.” Part of pursuing EASE was to dive deep into that internal dialogue and sensation to determine what actually does feel easy, right, and energy-giving versus energy-draining.

In business, that meant I worked on automaticity and systems so that parts of it could run in the background as I prioritized rest and other pursuits.

In relationships, that meant that with the limited resources I have in this stage of life (time, money, energy), I only wanted to spend on people that felt “easy” to me. And honestly in retrospect, I chose the people that were honest, steadfast, and genuine – all things I desperately needed post betrayal trauma.

A delightful night out in Seattle with one of my bests.

In January of this year, I made a list of activities that made me feel EASE and they still hold true 12 months later:
– walking outside
– sunshine
– morning routine
– cuddling with WB
– intentional eating and meal prep
– shifts at the Landing
– being “cat-trapped” by Hallford
– heat (hot tub, hot water shower, sauna)
– decorating my new space
– taking the train vs. driving

So TL;DR, I found some ease this past year and lived to blog about it. More blogging (and a new word) coming in 2026….cheers!

Swiftie Soundtrack (March edition)

Each month since re-discovering some of Taylor’s newer work, there seems to be one song that rises to the surface as extra meaningful or is played on repeat from my Spotify. I thought I would document those songs here to reflect on at a later date.

Death by a Thousand Cuts
Saying goodbye is death by a thousand cuts
Flashbacks waking me up
I get drunk, but it’s not enough
‘Cause the morning comes and you’re not my baby
I look through the windows of this love
Even though we boarded them up
Chandelier’s still flickering here
‘Cause I can’t pretend it’s ok when it’s not
It’s death by a thousand cuts

I dress to kill my time
I take the long way home
I ask the traffic lights if it’ll be all right
They say, “I don’t know”
And what once was ours is no one’s now
I see you everywhere
The only thing we share
Is this small town

You said it was a great love
One for the ages
But if the story’s over
Why am I still writing pages?

‘Cause saying goodbye is death by a thousand cuts
Flashbacks waking me up
I get drunk, but it’s not enough
‘Cause the morning comes and you’re not my baby
I look through the windows of this love
Even though we boarded them up
Chandelier still flickering here
‘Cause I can’t pretend it’s okay when it’s not
It’s death by a thousand cuts

My heart, my hips, my body, my love
Trying to find a part of me that you didn’t touch
Gave up on me like I was a bad drug
Now I’m searching for signs in a haunted club
Our songs, our films, united we stand
Our country, guess it was a lawless land
Quiet my fears with the touch of your hand
Paper cut stings from our paper thin plans

My time, my wine, my spirit, my trust
Trying to find a part of me you didn’t take up
Gave you too much but it wasn’t enough
But I’ll be all right, it’s just a thousand cuts

I get drunk but it’s not enough
‘Cause you’re not my baby
I look through the windows of this love
Even though we boarded them up
Chandelier’s still flickering here
‘Cause I can’t pretend it’s ok when it’s not
No, it’s not

It’s death by a thousand cuts (you didn’t touch)
Trying to find a part of me that you didn’t touch
My body, my love, my trust (it’s death by a thousand cuts)
But it wasn’t enough, it wasn’t enough, no, no

I take the long way home
I ask the traffic lights if it’ll be all right
They say, “I don’t know”

Previous monthly songs:
July – Long Live
August – Cruel Summer
September – It’s Time to Go
October – Illicit Affairs
November – Should’ve Said No
December – You’re Losing Me
January – Happiness
February – White Horse

5/40 On how you view yourself from the inside out

My grandmother has said some very wise words to me throughout my 39 years on this earth so her quotes may show up more than once here in my 40 moments/lessons list.

Today’s lesson is something she said to me a while back (I don’t even remember the context) but I have thought about it multiple times since she said it and repeat it back to folks often.

She said to me (when I must have been talking about a realization that I was getting older) “you always view yourself from the inside as if you were 21.”

And I find it so true!!! That’s why it’s so shocking when you throw your back out….or the grey hairs show up….or you realize the entire Super Bowl half time show is to make “the older generation” happy.

Oh low rise jeans.

To commemorate these wise words, a few photos from my 21st year without many cares in the world and before I learned a whole lot of hard life lessons (comments such as “you look exactly the same” and “wow I can’t believe that was 20 years ago” strongly encouraged).

On WonderBOY’s 13th birthday

Our WonderBOY is officially a WonderTEEN…..so many changes in his body, voice, and behaviors within the past year and seeing him as a young man is making me want to slow down time!

One thing I want to remember about the pandemic and stay at home is how much healing happened for WB….he is truly a creature of habit and connection and this time at home has truly been a gift for him and all of us. From stress and holes in wall the first month to sleeping in his own bed and a much better response to his anxiety and anger now. We are so very proud of you!!!

Birthday weeks get shared for these two!! How special…..

On the quiet of this space

I’ve only written 13 blog posts this year – my quietest writing year yet. Although the written words have been missing, my brain (and iPhone notes) have been alive with an almost overwhelming amount of thoughts, action plans, new understandings and unlearning of things I thought I knew. I do know for certain that 2020 was a monumental year for our family – some pretty tragic things happened that changed the gameplan for our future…..as well as some miracles that gave me hope along the way.

I want to capture those contradictory circumstances somehow here….for future generations to read and learn from our mistakes and our wins. To reflect on this historical year of 2020 and all that it was in the world, in our culture, and in my teeny tiny family as well. While I don’t have a whole lot going on this week (besides holding a few things together by a thread – see below image), it is my intention to reflect and wrap things up with some blog posts so stay tuned…..and join along in this reflection party if you’d like! I would love some (virtual) company!

On retirement

Today was my Mom’s last day of work at a credit union she’s been at for 36 years!!! I have so many memories of her at work and all of the incredible people she has worked with so I can’t even imagine how bittersweet this might feel for her…..

Without the ability to throw a party, her coworkers (and us family members) got to be creative in how to celebrate her and her legacy of hard work and dedication to this place and their members.

The siblings and I each took a day to deliver a surprise to her for her last week. My day was Thursday but since I also had to work, we did a little secret mission Wednesday night for her to see the next morning.

Her coworkers organized a video with past colleagues sharing messages of love and appreciation so we joined in the fun with a little addition from her kiddos. Click here to see video.

As with any retirement, this brings up wonderings about my impact and how colleagues and clients will view me 30 years from now. I love thinking long term and keeping this big picture in mind to help clarify and motivate me for all the little stuff I do now…..

Happy retirement Mom!!! We’ll have to come up with some creative ways to keep you from being bored here in the next couple of weeks…..

On my new toy

As some of you know, me and fitness/exercise have somewhat of a complicated history. Because of some history with disordered eating and exercise, I have to be careful with this element of my wellness. What that has looked like in the past couple of years is a complete lack of motivation and any energy around my physical fitness, which has been nagging at me as I strive to be my best self.

While I do keep myself healthy with essential oils and moderation in eating habits, I have only actually sweat from physical activity less than 5 times this entire year (kind of embarrassing to admit as a COACH, but real all the same).

After some research and talking to trusted friends and loved ones that own a Peloton, I decided to save my oil gig paychecks for this beauty to grace our household and help me change this narrative of fitness in my world.

Even though I am posting this in the cloud of New Years’ Resolutions and what not, I am actually 3 weeks in and I am already quite in love and obsessed. The instructors are inspiring, funny, entertaining (makes me forget how hard I’m working). Everyone in my family can use it and enjoy the rides. I also love that I can throw on Netflix and take a scenic ride at the same time, which really appeals to my love of multi-tasking.

The Peloton company and app of course have everything dialed in as far as keeping you accountable and giving people with a competitive edge (me, enneagram 3 in full force here) goals, achievements and personal records to go after.

A lot of people have messaged me and asked how I like it so far and if you have any specific questions, just message me and I’d love to answer them. I really haven’t heard one negative thing about it (besides some not using it enough for whatever reasons….) from people that have had theirs much longer than me.

And of course, I have a referral code for $100 in free accessories if you’re interested in saving a bit of money when ready to jump to the dark side!!!

I am ready to take on some major fitness goals in 2020 (major, as in, break a sweat more than 5 times in a calendar year) with this tool….and will hopefully document that journey here when I can!!!

On our 2019 #szn

Excerpt from Instagram:

I said it at the beginning of our season and it was every bit of truth at the finish – this group of players and seniors were SO ready for their moment to shine and show off their skills, their heart and their joy for this sport this season. A season filled with adversity, young and veteran players figuring out new roles and new traditions, and a LOT Of hard earned success. To top it off with two huge wins on Saturday in front of one of the biggest state crowds I can remember is a moment they and I will treasure forever. So grateful to be their coach and so very blessed with an amazing coaching staff by my side. ??? #ferndalevolleyball #fifthplace #noexcuses #saidalittle #didalot #flyinggeese @ Ferndale, Washington

On kiddo behavior….

One of the things I miss from my day-in, day-out job as school counselor is coaching parents on correcting problem behaviors in their homes. As part of my Ju-live event in my RootedWELL page on Facebook, I filmed this video and thought I would share the link here.

It got a little lengthy (20 minutes) but it’s just me downloading the most common and effective pieces of advice that I’ve given (and try to use daily in my home) throughout the years. Hope you enjoy!!!

Click here for video!

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