On the transition…

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Many people have asked how the transition to the new house has been on our sweet little Wonders. I had this post scheduled for today with only pictures (mattress store selfies while Dad does the shopping negotiating everything else less important than laying on beds and taking pics with the kiddos) but then wrote it last night when a few other transitions had popped up to cope with and process as well.WonderBOY was extremely anxious about moving. He was typically pretty anxious in our old home, never wanting to be on a separate floor from us and on most nights, ending up on the floor in our room or at the top of the stairs sleeping so he can hear us watching tv downstairs. I remember the day that Scott got our keys to the new place and started moving our first load…..we came in after the packing and as soon as WB saw the “empty” living room, he just started crying. The fear of not knowing where “our things” went was very hard for him.

The deep fears of loss and abandonment not only get attached to people, but to belongings that hold memories and comfort for this little man. Assuring him that our things were indeed at the new house and even his self-packed boxes were waiting for him in his new room were not enough…..after another load was packed, he was filled with relief and joy when seeing his new room and his “stuff.” So excited in fact, that he didn’t even look at the rest of the house and got to work right away organizing his room. So sweet…..since settling in, he has started to feel more comfortable and has even tested out sleeping in his own room (even though we are on separate floors now and out of earshot). Throwing our big “snow week” into the mix after the move may have done more damage than good with transitioning as my little man craves structure and routine and that week had absolutely ZERO of that. I am looking forward to a few weeks of normal schedule here to get us back on track.WonderGIRL has loved the move to our new house, due to the fact that she has some fun girl friends she already knows that live close by (thank you coaching world for inserting players and their younger sisters into our tribe for this very benefit). Working on her room together and giving her more independence with the kitchen and more breathing room is going to be such a positive for her.

WG has been praying for more “foster siblings” since we moved as we had to renew our home study and paperwork last week. In a fate-filled turn of events, two sweet young girls came home with us for a short-term stay (on the very date WG and WB came home with us three years prior – crazy right?). The one thing WG thought she was missing from her life came with some very hard feelings when the reality of that wish came true. Feelings of “being replaced” and jealousy toward the other girls in the house were big topics of conversation as we cared for new friends in our home and shared our rooms, our meals, and our love. I have faith this will get easier for her as we continue to open our homes to children in need and start trusting that she is ours forever and ever, no matter who we get to love on and care for temporarily.

As I shared the news today with my Wonders that our new friends wouldn’t be coming back home with us tonight and that they were waiting for a new plan at the CPS office, WG promptly replied “Shouldn’t we go sit with them? They are probably so scared.” Tears start forming as I remember this because I knew they were scared too but didn’t have the same panic response as her who lived it and endured it a few years back and THAT breaks my heart and makes me love her so so much all at the same time. It is moments and statements like these (which I NEED) to remind me that this girl is:
1. a fighter and has endured tragic events so much worse than I can even imagine.
2. ready to care for others (probably better then she can care for herself).
3. learning about compassion and perspective taking in some big ways.
4. someone that can use her trauma to help others, maybe only to inspire them when she thrives as a hopeful story but also to connect in ways that may of us truly can’t understand.

3 year live-a-versary!

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3 years ago today, WonderGIRL and WonderBOY got to come home with us. The first couple of days were a lovey, chaotic blur. Interested in the whole story? Click here to relive that weekend.

Saying yes to “an short term” emergency weekend stay for the Wonders was preceeded by an activity inspired by a church sermon at Cornwall, encouraging us to surrender our plans and our control to God. These paintings were an artistic outlet for me in processing that message and making it apply to my life. Little did I know that three days later, I would be asked to surrender in a HUGE way and then be rewarded in an even GREATER way than I could have imagined. (Also surrendered in the process – sleep, scrapbooking, my sanity, faith in my abilities to keep a kiddo with trauma safe, time to get ready, and date nights but who’s keeping track). We have created so many fun memories together on our “live-a-versary” celebrations (monthly for the first year and now annually) – the following pictures are from our secret weekend field trip from last year to Seattle. The year before that, we traveled to Friday Harbor, a favorite date spot of Scott and I.This year, we will have a quiet celebration at home followed by a bigger celebration this coming weekend as we get to celebrate our official adoption and welcoming our loved ones to our new home.

Funny story – I’ve been trying to plan our adoption party for quite a few months now…..venues and dates just never seemed to work out for all sorts of silly reasons. In hindsight, I attribute this to another reminder that God is in true control as now we have the perfect “party house” for the perfect “party” reason on the anniversary weekend of what turned out to be the perfect way for us to start our forever family – all which were causing my constant need for control personality quite a bit of anxiety. Perhaps I need to listen to that “I surrender” message a few more times…..

Back to the dale….

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These past two weeks have been full of surprises – a super fast close and move date and then a whole week off with snow to settle in! As many of you know from the paint samples that were on our old living room wall for well over a year, I have some commitment issues when it comes to decorating a house. This week with our snow-mageddon storm, I had some time to work all of that out and start making our HOUSE a HOME. Part of that included quite a bit of Amazon shopping which then I felt super guilty about – sorry beloved delivery people – your sacrifical efforts this week to get to our house in the weather and bring me my furniture were SOOOOOO appreciated.Still deciding if I like this headboard or not with the navy and white decor. Perhaps with the wood dresser and some cooler nightstands – it will go better? Feel free to weigh in – it helps with the indecisiveness.Love love love the sliding barn doors on our closet – poor Scott is living out of a different closet since this one is a bit small but so cute to have a little nook all to myself.Did I mention that our downstairs has a FULL KITCHEN??? We love all of the possibilities that this opens up, including keeping the kiddos contained during snack and breakfast times. Scott found this adorable little table and chairs to perfect their personal “kid cafe.”I know many of you saw the progression of WonderGIRL’s room unfold over Instagram posts, but today we added real mattresses and bedding and the inner 14 year old me is uber jealous about this whole situation (although the real 14 year old me should be extremely grateful because I had a huge room, bathroom, and most importantly, the DJ Tanner phone in my room where I could sneak three way calls after bedtime with all my homies – so thank you Mom and Dad).We don’t have much in our upstairs living space and I hope to build the room around this amazing vintage-y piece of goodness I found at our local furniture store. I am so excited to actually get to put my scrapbooks on display versus hidden in my craft room. Don’t mind the cluttered mess on top – I’m feeling out what looks good and where all my “mantle” decor from the old place can go.I used to be utterly ENAMORED with these old Bobbsey Twin books on display at my Grandma and Grandpa’s house growing up. After the passing of my Grandpa and my Grandma moving out of their beloved home, I was the lucky recipient of these gems. I feel honored to get to display them for future generations of readers to lovingly peruse while visiting my house as well. The copy of Gone with the Wind shown on the right is from 1913 – how cool is that????

As many people have mentioned, the renovation that the previous owners did on this house are beautiful and PERFECT for our family. We are extremely grateful to them for putting such care and attention to detail in so many place throughout the house – hopefully they catch this post and others on FB (the previous owner is a childhood classmate of mine) and can see some of the results and love come out of their amazing efforts in fixing up their home for a future family.

On moving….

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The stars and powers above that be have teamed up to align and we are moving!!! Although we’re pretty content in our current home, we would love to add some more room (separate rooms to be exact) for the kiddos and for potentially more children in our home. We thought our “starter home” was dang big when we moved in….add two energetic school-age children to the mix and voila! We’re constantly on top of each other!!!When looking for our forever home to team up with our new forever family (still gives me all the feels to say that), we had a few key things we were looking for. Extra rooms for more foster/adopted children. A separate living space, especially for entertaining our friends and family and their lovely kiddos! A mother-in-law suite or independent living space for WonderGIRL  to grow into and practice independent living before heading out into the real world (insert extreme Mama anxiety here). The house we found has all of these specifications and we are so lucky we found it when we did! It even has a special nook (see picture above) that the Wonders have deemed our “cool-down” spot to escape to when feelings are strong and tempers are hot.Oh ya and the master bathroom after their recent renovation on the house is !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
It’s been fun to share the planning and decorating ideas with the kiddos. I can’t wait to be intentional with our spaces and create some calm, happy places for each member of our family (and future family members too!).The “mess” of moving has been interesting to process with WonderGIRL and WonderBOY. Moves before for them have been forced on them and the result of usually negative experiences (a relationship change, being kicked out, foster care, etc.). They also haven’t traveled with all of their belongings before. Sometimes they wander around our current house and point at objects, asking, “Do we get to bring this?” And we respond with “Yes. All of it. We are literally CARRYING all of this into our new house piece by piece, box by box.” Their eyes and smiles get big after this response.

We have also used this experience to teach them about the value of money. That moving into a nice house is a result of smart management of our money. We are careful to tell WG and WB that “we aren’t CHOOSING to spend our money on that” instead of “We don’t have money for that.” They both know we have money (and most likely, much more money in our family than what they are used to) and we don’t want to lie to them with dismissive statements like that. We reinforce these concepts each time we go shopping, create wish lists for birthdays and Christmas, and head out to meals together as a family.

I’m sure there will be more stories to share as this adventure unfolds but thank you for all of your kind support and some of your physical support too (you know who you are crazy friends that actually ENJOY the moving process and have helped us so far). Cheers to new adventures!

Snippets of daily life

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My weekend consisted of lots of down time, extra big mugs of coffee and dowsing myself in this amazing Hope oil. Although I know many people think our life is go, go, go…..in reality our weekends are intentionally bare for us all to recharge and connect before the workweek/schoolweek begins again. I know this might change once WonderBOY starts getting into more sports so I am appreciating every relaxing moment of this season.Speaking of relaxing moments, this photo is in response to my prompt, “you must eat two bites of cauliflower before moving on with your day”….avoidance tactic of choice today? WB takes a 3 hour nap. Parents are so mean…..until he realized that the same cauliflower tastes kinda gross 3 hours later.
Sometimes, self-care means escaping to the mall to get storage bins from Target and coming home 2 hours later with some new shoes. Also, trying to ONLY get one item from Target is like eating one red vine from the Costco sized red vine bucket… simply impossible.
With some heightened emotions around our house for a number of reasons, I am loving giving both Wonders this teeny tiny box and letting them choose what they need to calm down and move on. Aromatherapy and kids is such a magical combination due to their heightened amygdala response to stimuli – if you haven’t tried it yet with kiddos, I highly recommend (and can point you to a good starting spot if you’d like – message me if you want more details).Sharing each step of our big moving adventure (more details to come soon) with the kiddos has been so very exciting! It’s amazing some of their misconceptions and confusion around moving for a positive reason and with ALL of our stuff. Their past experiences with moving involve mostly negative situations, new parental figures and relationships, and according to them, with only the amount of possessions they can fit in a backpack. WonderGIRL and I have bonded over pinning many many pictures of potential room decor ideas – this color combination is currently in the lead!!!

I didn’t forget!!!

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…..well I kind of did. But then I remembered and now I feel guilty and now I am going to make up for lost time. Last year, I did a teeny tiny giveaway on my blog and asked for feedback on what you might want to read about in the future from my little bloggity blog.

Here were some of your answers (published here as a to-do list for me in the next couple of weeks!):
– family fitness
– traveling with kiddos
– how to create and maintain meaningful adult relationships
– building community in a new place
– growing/strengthening/surviving your marriage while raising kiddos
– balancing the side gig with the real gig and a family (and whether or not it’s worth it to do so…..the side gig part, not the family part of course)

Although I’m certainly not a master or expert in any of these areas, I would love to share if it might help even just one of you AND I also love starting some conversation around the topic for others to share as well. If there’s anything else that you might be interested in my take on, please feel free to leave a comment. If I run out of ideas, I might post even less than I do now!!!

(Oh and I  also flaked out big-time on getting one lovely blog reader her very lovely freebie – she’s lovely because she extends big time grace like winning something and then not nagging me about actually giving it away)

If you like exploring ideas around personal and family wellness, I share all sorts of different stuff on my rootedwell Instagram page. Feel free to explore!

My One Little Word for 2017

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Throwback to some history on my One Little Word Journey

My one little word for 2017 found me while I listened to this Lively podcast featuring Erin Lochner (very excited to  read her new book, Chasing Slow). They discussed the difference between ALLOWing something into your life (with joy) and TOLERATING something (with disdain). Although I contemplated some other words to focus on this upcoming year, this one kept speaking to my heart time and time again.

I will allow:
– my daughter to dress how she wants to dress, style her hair how she wants to style her hair, and take pictures of what she wants to take pictures of because she is a unique force of a human that I do not want to restrict in any way from developing her true self (I’m putting this first because for some reason, this one might prove to be the hardest for me)
– my son to become a young man even though I so desperately want him to stay little
– my husband to cope with his stuff in ways he needs to cope with his stuff
– my students to express themselves in a variety of ways, not just in my step-by-step directed ways
– myself to connect with friends and girlfriends WITHOUT feeling guilty about missing time with my family
– intentional time to be made for creative pursuits each week
– time each day to reflect on gratitude and express that gratitude to those that gifted me that which I am grateful
– good things to happen to my family without second guessing who is judging from afar
WITH JOY.

I will NOT allow:
– screentime to become more important than eye contact and deep connection with my kids
– my insecurities to block my successes
– others around me to struggle with ailments, both physical and emotional without an effort from me to help (even if it’s an offer to help through the medicinal properties of an open bottle of red wine)
– politics to shade my hope and belief in Americans, America, and our future generations of change-makers

My little family set some goals on New Year’s Eve together. We are using an amazing goal-tracker by Elise Joy (get yours here for FREE) to track our PROGRESS (not perfection) at these goals this year. One week in, and this has already been a great way to keep each other accountable and have some meaningful conversations about reaching our goals, both big and small.Happy New Year to all of my loved friends and family – thank you for checking in on us every now and again. I can’t wait to keep sharing our wins and our struggles this year as we keep chugging away at this little thing called life.

A WONDERful 2016

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My intention with this blog was/is to document the big and little stories of US just as we are. Here are a few slices of that world that I hope never to forget.

First of all, these two littles ones love each other so much. Their joy and giggles when they are around each other are truly unique, considering how many years are between them. This year, they begun having some deeper conversations but also begun pestering each other to no end. And while I know that is a normal sibling phenomenon, I find a spark of comfort in their endless bickering because it is far better than their dysfunctional parenting dynamic when they came to live with us….in our home, when WB and WG are exhibiting age-appropriate and normal behaviors, even the problematic ones, we are happy about it!WonderGIRL’s highlights from 2016:First of all, these pictures give me all the feels because our LITTLE girl is growing up. Especially in the last 6 months or so, her attitude, demeanor and looks have really matured. I am especially proud of how much she is overcoming in regards to adjusting to our new family and accepting/processing her past family and memories that pop up for her. We are really grateful for a great counselor for WonderGIRL to help with this processing because sometimes my own emotions can cloud the true listening that she needs.

This year, she got braces, a new cell phone, and a broken leg as she performed a pretty awesome front flip at the Trampoline Zone. This year, she also complained about her braces, lost her cell phone due to breaking our fairly strict contract, and gained lots of sympathy and attention for said broken leg…..all markers of a darn-near typical teenage girlie.

WonderGIRL’s highlights:
Movie: Moana (girl power!!!) and Pirates of the Carribbean
TV show: Gilmore Girls with mama
Books: Twilight series and A Dog’s Purpose/Journey
Music: Ariana Grande, Alessia Cara and Justin Beiber
Favorite memory: Getting my phone (she says with jazz hands above her head)
Funniest quote that Mama’s brain can remember on Dec. 30th: “This sand is so different than the sand in Cannon Beach.” (Mama: “Uh….this is Cannon Beach”). Her memory and attention skills create some pretty humorous (and repetitive) conversations, let me tell ya.

WonderBOY’s highlights:
This boy turned 8 this year and while I still view him as my little squishy, cuddly, little guy….sometimes his maturity and logic really amaze me (as does the picture above where he looks so darn grown up)! This year, he has finally started connecting the dots between making good choices and being truthful and how much more peaceful our days can be together. He is down to only 1 timeout every couple of weeks and that, my friends, is a miracle. There are many times during family conversations that WB has the appropriate and wise answer regarding behavior and choices before his big sis.

This year was our first conference at school, that his BEHAVIORS fit in with the rest of his peers. Although he still struggles with some learning, he is respectful and focused in class and we are so proud of him for that! At home, WB is most often found in his underwear as this kid just runs at a hotter temperature than the rest of us. With the big snow that came this year, we had to buy some athletic leggings to go under his usual uniform of basketball shorts and a t-shirt. Speaking of basketball, he began playing on an organized team this year and we love watching his skills and understanding of the game grow and grow. My coach’s heart and brain is especially happy when I see what a good teammate he is from the bench, cheering on his teammates and supporting their every move.

WonderBOY’s highlights:
Movie: Sing
TV show: Teen Titans GO!
Books: Notebook of Doom and Eerie Elementary
Music:Jason DeRulo and FloRida
Favorite memory: Great Wolf Lodge, Portland on the train, and Cannon Beach
Funniest quote that Mama’s brain can remember on Dec. 30th: “Hey there how ya doing….balk balk” (said in an extremely cute and accurate parrot voice with a switch to a chicken for the finale)This pic cracks me up because we get this blank look as soon we ask WB to do something he doesn’t want to do. We’re onto you and your little tricks of looking cute to get out of hard work…..and it only worked a few times half the time mister.

Thank you for reading this little blog stroll along memory lane…..I can’t wait to check back in a year and see how far they will continue to grow and thrive! Cheers to a new year!!!

Holiday highlights 2016

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Holidays are pretty magical with kiddos – our favorite parts often are smaller moments that come from seeing old friends, completing our Christmas countdown activities, and celebrating the birth of Jesus. Although presents are fun and exciting, I feel like our little fam does a good job balancing the small joy of those with the BIGGER joy of being together and showing acts of compassion towards others.

I am lucky in that some of my bests come home each year to see THEIR family which gives me some small moments to sneak in visits and dates out of the house. Matching sweaters for the festive win!My littlest niece is the cutest right??? So smiley…..And my oldest niece from my side is pretty darn cute herself…..same size as WonderBOY and just as tough. Love her to pieces!This year, my family served at a Cornwall church service and we got to hand out links as families walked in. What a great practice of social cues for WG (eye contact and facial expressions) and a fun privilege for WB who loves sneaking into “big human” church when he can! Favorite song from our service this year from him included a peppy version of “Go Tell It On the Mountain” in which he sung “go tell it! go go tell it!” all night long.WonderGIRL’s gift from Santa – a new instax camera. Super cute, actually good quality photos and some fun accessories to go with it. Also, check her new Christmas eve HAPPY JAMS – so many emojies, so many selfies, so little time…..WonderBOY’s “something you want” gift from us was this starter BB gun. Scott is big on teaching him appropriate gun safety so safety glasses are a must. I think this pic of him in his new robe and snowboots (a white Christmas for once!) with Scott in shorts and romeo’s behind him are pretty darn cute so I had to include it here!
Our favorite gift this year was surprising the kiddos with a Disney Cruise for NEXT Christmas. Scott and I have been saving all of our overtime (his) and doTerra commissions (me) towards this trip for over a year now and we’re too excited to wait even a year. They had to embark on their annual scavenger hunt for this present which was a surprise at the very end of the morning.
With all of the Hoelzle children together in a household, shenanigans often arise. This year, Mom surprised us with our favorite childhood meal, “red weiners”!!! You can see our excitement below. Along with this meal, there are some strict meal guidelines one must follow: 1. Create an appropriate mashed potato volcano for the gravy to rest in before eating. 2. Enjoy this delicacy made of dollar store ketchup and hot dogs by pretending treating it like the best meal you’ve ever eaten.The family fantasy football league championship game down to me versus my older brother, BJ this year. The deciding game was MNF’s Dallas game. Off to Buffalo Wild Wings with the children in tow we went (tablets to keep them occupied…..boneless wings to keep BJ satisfied). The “Audrey” trophy sat atop our table the entire time, which attracted a large number of waiters coming over to join in on the rivalry. Here I am posing with MY new trophy as I was declared the winner early in the 4th quarter of the game. First time winning for me – woot woot!Safely buckled for the ride home with Mama!

Other fun memories I want to document:
– playing Pie Face and BeanBoozled for the first time with friends and family
– Scott and his lack of rhyming skills for the scavenger hunt
– my experiments with the Instant pot and mini cheesecakes for Christmas dessert
– Christmas extravaganza with Mallory and Travis at Warm Beach with 20 degree weather to see the Lights of Christmas (never again)
– Snow days and late starts to school
– Santa train with the McConkeys out in Blaine (must do if you didn’t get a chance this year)